BILL GATES RAMAYAN

When Bill Gates was in India, he had a chance 2 listen Ramayana from Vajpayee. After returning 2 US he wrote
it in his personal Diary which has been recently found (courtesy PTI). These are excerpts from his diary:


Ramayana by Bill Gates...



LAN, LAN ago, in the SYSTEM of I/O-dhya, there

ruled a PROCESSOR named DOS-rat. Once he

EXECUTED a great sacrifice PROGRAM after which

his queens gave an OUTPUT of four SUNs - RAM,

LSIman, BUG-rat and SED-rughana.

RAM the eldest was a MICROCHIP with excellent

MEMORY. His brothers, however, were only

PERIPHERAL ICs. Once when RAM was only 16MB, he

married princess C ta.

12 years passed and DOS-rat decided to INSTALL

RAM as his successor.However, Queen CIE/CAE

(Kayegayee), who was once offered a boon by DOS-

rat for a lifesaving HELP COMMAND, took this

opportunity at the instigation of her BIOSed maid

and insisted that her son Bug-rat be INSTALLED and

that RAM be CUT-N-PASTED to the forest for 14

years. At this cruel and unexpected demand, a SURGE

passed through DOS-rat and he CRASHED like

unstable version of AI MSN does in intel.

RAM agreed to LOG INTO forest and C ta insisted to

LOGIN with him. LSI-man also resolved on LOGGING

IN with his brother. The forest was the dwelling of

SPARCnakha, the TRAN-SISTOR of RAW-van,

PROCESSOR of LAN-ka. Attracted by RAM, she

proposed that he should marry her. RAM, politely

declined, perceiving C ta to be his SOURCE CODE.

She hastened to kill her but LSI-man cut her

inportant PERIPHERALS. Weeping, SPARC-nakha fled

to LAN-ka, where RAW-van, moved by TRAN-SIS

TOR s plight, approached his uncle MAR-icha. MAR-

icha REPROGRAMED himself to form a golden stag

and drew RAM deep into the forest. Finally, RAM

shot the deer, which, with his last breath, cried out

for LSI-man in voice of RAM s SOUND CARD. Fooled

by this VIRTUAL RAM SOUND, C ta urged LSI-man

to his brother s aid. Catching the opportunity, RAW-

van DELINKED C ta from her LIBRARY and changed

her ROOT DIRECTORY to LAN-ka.



------------ --------- ---INTERVAL- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- ----



RAM and LSI-man started SEARCHING for the

missing C ta all over the forest. They made friendship

with

the forest SYSTEM ADMINISTRATOR Akshat

sorry... SU-greev and his powerful co-processor Ha-

NEUMAN. who agreed to help RAM. SU-greev

ordered his PROGRAMMERS to use powerful

SEARCH techniques learnt in CS130 to FIND the

missing C ta. His PROGRAMMERS SEARCHED

allaround the INTER-NETworked forests. Many tried

to EXCITE the birds and animals not to forget the

WEBCRAWLERS (Insects) and tried to INFOSEEK

something about C ta. Some of them even shouted

YAA-HOO but they all ended up with NO FOUND

MESSAGES Google, Lycos nothing was left

untouched. The only thing they forgot was to mail

iitcse01 & get PTI s help. Ha-NEUMAN then devised

a RISCy TECHNOLOGY and used it to cross the seas

at an astonishing CLOCK SPEED. Soon Ha-NEUMAN

DOWNLOADED himself into LAN-ka. Ha-NEUMAN

found C ta under a brown - green (as Brahma will call

it) TREE STRUCTURE Ha-NEUMAN used the LOGIN

ID (ring) to identify himself to C ta. After

DECRYPTING THE KEY, C ta asked him to send

STATUS_OK MESSAGE to RAM.

Meanwhile all raakshasa BUGS around C ta captured

Ha-NEUMAN to DELETE him using everything

including

Ctrl-Alt-Del. But Ha-NEUMAN spread chaos by

spreading VIRUS Fire . Ha-NEUMAN pressed

ESCAPE from LAN-kaand & conveyed all the STATUS

MESSAGES to RAM and SU-greev. RAW-wan

decided to take RAM head-on. One of the RAW-wan s

SUN almost DELETED LSI-man with a Brahma -astra.

But Ha-NEUMAN resorted to some ACTIVE-

Xgradients and REFORMATTED LSI-man. RAM used

the SOURCE CODE secrets of RAW-wan and wiped

out RAW-wan s presence on earth. Later, RAM got

INSTALLED in I/O-dhya and spreaded his USER

FRIENDLY PROGRAMS to all USERS and everyone

lived happily ever after, playing & enjoying AOE.